CONTENTS

    1. Paradise

    2. Golf in Paradise

    3. Paradise in Paradise

    4. Golf in another Paradise

    5. Environment, Roads and Safety

    6. Dress Code & Gender Equality

    7. It pays to advertise

    8. Literally thoughts

 

Paradise


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The best beach in the Indian Ocean, India’s very own ocean. This is Seychelles’: Anse Lazio beach with its crystal clear blue waters. The water polishes the sand every five minutes, freeing it of undignified human footmarks. Seychelles is a country spread over 115 coral islands and an area deemed to be a paradise on this earth for its dazzling white beaches and crystal clear blue waters. Its lush vegetation and a rare tree that led some to believe that it must be the original location of the biblical "Garden of Eden".

 
Golf in Paradise


On the left of the 13th green is the 18th fairway leading to the conclusive green behind the lake.

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Seychelles’ credentials as a true paradise however were questionable for a long time as this country had no golf courses -- hard to imagine a paradise without quality golf! A golf course was finally created in 2000, exactly as you would imagine golf courses in paradise – with divine support for your game. It has magical holes which will add 50-70 yards to all your clubs, irrespective of your handicap, swing, age and gender. This is thanks to 6 holes located on the hills. On the incredibly picturesque and downhill 18th, add 60-70 yards to your drive.

 


On the signature 15th, the green is 120 yards below your feet, and leads to the Georgette beach for a cooling break.

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On the signature 15th, teeing-off from a hill, the ball drops as much as the yardage – and a sand wedge can carry you 150 yards.

However, the course is not without perils. The course is abundantly dotted with water, sea, sands, trees, hills and thick forests – all those magnificent gifts of nature so hated by the golfers.

Be prepared to lose several balls. The course is challenging and unforgiving, but that is more than adequately made up by the pleasure of playing in the rather picturesque surroundings. The weather remains warm the entire year, but rarely oppressive. It rains often in Seychelles, but not long enough to ruin a round – consequently, the greens will always hold and plugged balls are common (you may want to check the exact rule about this).

 

Paradise in Paradise


The "Coco de Mer" is revered in Seychelles (the nut in a polished version here).

Seychelles is also the island alleged to be home to the original Garden of Eden. It is best known for a palm tree "Coco de Mer" whose ripened fruit has the uncanny shape of a female pelvis, which is also the country’s national symbol, arguably a fitting symbol for paradise. More remarkably, though less hyped, the tree also possesses the world’s largest leaf, up to 10 feet in length. However, not to worry, this rare tree with its monstrous leaves and distracting fruits are confined to a forest reserve and not found on the golf course.

Purchase of this much vaunted pelvis incarnate can set you back by as much as Euro 300 (arguably still much cheaper than the real thing).

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Seychelles is not cheap, but does paradise have a price? Medium to top end hotels cost between Euro 150 to 400, though comfortable guest houses are available for less than Euro 100. But look at the brighter side – at least this paradise can be bought, and is value. The beaches are amazing, snorkeling/diving is available in plenty, has some very rare flora and fauna, tropical fruits are a treat, traffic jams and parking problems unheard of (the country has only one traffic light signal!!), seafood is in plenty, and a world class domestic beer is available in all grocery shops (chilled).

 
 
Golf in Another Paradise (Kabul Golf & Country Club)

The Kabul Golf & Country Club, a luxury resort & pioneer in safe golf – provides free Kalashnikovs to keep your stay safe (sponsored by NRA of USA).

Safety first, correctness later

  • The bald greens are a testimony to the cruelty of war – even golf courses are not spared
  • Serious dress code violation & visor-less caps
  • Weapon grounded (2 stroke penalty)

 


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Correct Golf

  • Perfect weight transfer
  • Perfect arms transfer (from black markets)
  • Arms presented for direct fire
  • Turret aimed at the slow four-ball ahead. (Etiquette demands indirect fire first, before blasting out slow play)
 
Environment, Roads and Safety


In case you haven’t noticed, the emergency phone is a mere 174 km away.

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Hybrid Vehicle


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What if oil prices reach $ 100? Environmentalists working on a questionable new hybrid vehicle? (Though emissions here can be pretty foul as well.)

What is wrong with this photo? Is the attendant pouring down the wrong hole?

It is merely that a farmer in India rode his camel cart to the gas station to buy diesel for his farm water pump.

 
 
Dress Sense and Gender Equality

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Dress Sense


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This is the doorman at the Le Meridien hotel in Vanuatu, a South Pacific island. In his national dress. Only men are sensibly allowed to wear the sash above the skirt

The hotel is designed like an island hut, thus has no doors. So here is a doorman, but no doors. He opens the doors of the cars.

The country and region became famous for its cuisine when they ate up most of the missionaries who came to convert them to Christianity. Though they are a bit shy about this, preferring to call such meat as "big pig". Caution: if you eat in the McDonald in Vanuatu, just check the contents of "Big Mac" given the policy of Mc to adjust to local culture (e.g. no pork in Muslim countries, no beef in India etc.)

The persecution of a modern Christ


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The British bobby’s helmet can be used to shield body parts other than the skull as well. Michael O’Brian, the first famous streaker on the Rugby field in Twickenham, U.K.

 
An archer’s filthy arm


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It pays to advertise



To clarify, the ad is by “Skyline Scaffolding

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Literally thoughts


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